This Mosquito Bites

Ok, here's my pet peeve about mosquitos. When they bite you, they do two things. 1) They take some of your blood, and 2) they leave an irritating agent that causes you to itch. You know, I don't care if you take my blood. Go on, have it. I won't miss such a minute amount. But why in the heck do they have to leave the other and leave me miserable? What's the point? It's one of those unfair things about nature.

Speaking of unfair...I just had a showdown with a mosquito in my dining room and I have to say the odds were heavily in my favor. You see, I have a Chinese bug zapper. If you can put your hands on one of these things they are great fun. They have replaced fly swatters in my house and have become something of a sport around here--sometimes we let flies in just for a good time. Instead of whacking and smashing the fly to smithereens (and spreading his pesky little guts all over your kitchen counter), the zapper works in a much more hygienic fashion. You push a button that activates a little electrical field across a panel of metal spokes and you're ready to go. All you have to do is make contact with the fly and

ZAP!

he's toast...literally. You can even get him in mid air if you're that good--which I am. Then all you have to do is pick up your fried fly with a tissue and toss him. Every once in awhile, you get a little bugger who is strong enough to withstand the shock and will keep flying or buzzing around in circles on the floor, but another jolt or two and he's a goner. So, if you're looking for some good, clean bug-zapping fun, head on down to your local Asian market and see if you can pick one up. Just don't make the same mistake that I did when I first saw it. Oh, what's this? Hmmm, I think I'll push the little button. Doesn't do anything...hmmm, I think I'll touch these little metal bars. BZZZZZT!!! I just about jumped out of my skin...but I was hooked.